tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post7899440111588302215..comments2024-01-05T05:50:22.989-05:00Comments on Thoughts in Progress: Not Another Casserole: Comforting a Grieving ParentSavannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15118900505228075022noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-49541264402855387882011-06-21T19:36:33.715-04:002011-06-21T19:36:33.715-04:00Beautiful. That kind of compassion and understandi...Beautiful. That kind of compassion and understanding is not common enough.<br /><br />I've taught several kids with bipolar disorder and it can be so hard for them to cope. My thoughts and sympathies are with you for your loss.Jemi Fraserhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02214408467456320167noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-89800865280207677272011-06-21T09:23:47.544-04:002011-06-21T09:23:47.544-04:00What a touching post. What a wonderful support Ma...What a touching post. What a wonderful support Madeline's neighbor was during the grieving process.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-57945478842400150062011-06-20T22:37:51.072-04:002011-06-20T22:37:51.072-04:00Again, I'm so thankful that so many of you rea...Again, I'm so thankful that so many of you read my blog post today. And many thanks to Mason for hosting me. <br />All of you are so caring as was my neighbor. We all need people like her in our lives. I hope you'll stop by my blog sometime as well.madeline40https://www.blogger.com/profile/06549058012582815995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-52329619595933446072011-06-20T21:23:59.136-04:002011-06-20T21:23:59.136-04:00Madeline's best gift was her neighbor. How ble...Madeline's best gift was her neighbor. How blessed they both are.Mary@GigglesandGunshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07350818228268801008noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-2130284517477520372011-06-20T18:48:37.669-04:002011-06-20T18:48:37.669-04:00Just a quick note to say thanks to everyone for dr...Just a quick note to say thanks to everyone for dropping by today. Hope everyone is having a good day.<br /><br />Madeline, thanks again for guest blogging and sharing this insightful post. We really don't know how to relate to others when they are grieving even though we want to help. Your post sheds new light on that.Mason Canyonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10935307400882363560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-65589530601241462552011-06-20T18:04:38.604-04:002011-06-20T18:04:38.604-04:00It's hard to know what to say and difficult wh...It's hard to know what to say and difficult when it's someone close. Madeline's friend did a wonderful thing.Alex J. Cavanaughhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09770065693345181702noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-79518034068180411292011-06-20T16:16:00.266-04:002011-06-20T16:16:00.266-04:00My wife died in 1999. Our two kids Rory and Sean ...My wife died in 1999. Our two kids Rory and Sean were 7 and 3 at the time. A few weeks after her death, an acquaintance stopped by with an envelope for the boys. She was the mom of one of Rory's 1st grade classmates who frequently talked to Trici in the playground as they waited for the school day to end. This mom had written down every single thing she could remember about my wife. What her clothes looked, her earrings, her perfume, funny stories she shared about the boys...everything. She told me she wanted to be sure that when the boys grew older...they had details about their beautiful mommy. I was so very touched. Thanks, Tom Zuba (www.facebook.com/tomzuba1)Tom Zubahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15084686153626199000noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-70120876381633222892011-06-20T15:47:03.100-04:002011-06-20T15:47:03.100-04:00What a beautiful piece of writing, Madeline, and w...What a beautiful piece of writing, Madeline, and what a powerful description of such deep grief. That neighbor was like a godsend, wasn't she? It always restores my faith in humanity when I hear of people like that.<br /><br />Mason, thanks for bringing Madeline Sharples work to my attention.<br /><br />JaiJai Joshihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04858987106548357551noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-52578766356078960732011-06-20T14:24:04.877-04:002011-06-20T14:24:04.877-04:00Thank you all so much on your wonderful and caring...Thank you all so much on your wonderful and caring comments. I'm so fortunate to be Mason's guest today. I'll keep dropping by to check on what's happening. <br /><br />One thing for us all to remember is there is no right or wrong way to grieve or to comfort someone who is grieving. I just shared one person's way that resonnated with me. Believe me, the food and kitchen detail and vacuuming helped a lot too.<br /><br />Love to you all,<br />Madelinemadeline40https://www.blogger.com/profile/06549058012582815995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-86912449784089837642011-06-20T10:08:26.610-04:002011-06-20T10:08:26.610-04:00What a great post. It is always so good to have a ...What a great post. It is always so good to have a friend like that who can respond so instinctively to grieving friends. So many times friends freeze and don't know what to say or do, so they fall back on platitudes and food. Death and dying and suicide are issues few people don't want to shy away from.Maryannwriteshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09479027709233807149noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-46466194093616763052011-06-20T09:13:05.857-04:002011-06-20T09:13:05.857-04:00Hi Mason and Madeleine .. it's a wonderful off...Hi Mason and Madeleine .. it's a wonderful offering that is available for us to read - we can learn so much.<br /><br />I definitely would be a better comforter now - 5 years ago I wouldn't have known what to do .. blogging teaches us and offers us so much.<br /><br />Patti's basket is just the right sort of neighbourly comfort - so appropriate ..<br /><br />Thanks so much - very sad and poignant .. HilaryHilary Melton-Butcherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17596532480645510678noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-13225376306886747822011-06-20T08:55:43.875-04:002011-06-20T08:55:43.875-04:00Grieving is not an easy path to walk, either as an...Grieving is not an easy path to walk, either as an individual walking the path, or watching a friend or sibling having to walk it.<br /><br />I laughed at the title of the blog article, not another casserole. But when it's a family, the last thing you feel like doing is cooking, so I was thankful for those dishes. For many, cooking is positive and tangible way to show support and caring. I had a freezer full of caring. <br /> <br />I try hard not to be intrusive--I didn't like it as one who grieved.I try to provide an ear and shoulder. I also have written little notes, shared encouraging bits and pieces of poetry (some my own, some from others), an uplifting scripture. It depends upon the person and how well I know them and I space those cards and notes out over the course of time--grieving does go beyond the memorial service. I especially try to share a note, card, or even a phone call around the *firsts.* the first year, anniversary, a birthday, holidays.<br /><br />Madeline, I'm sorry for your loss. It's not an easy thing to lose a child and grief is a funny thing with very little awareness of time gone by. I've watch my sister struggle to deal with it all. Even after four years there are days...<br /><br /><a href="http://www.siamckye.blogspot.com" rel="nofollow">Sia McKye's Thoughts...OVER COFFEE</a>~Sia McKye~https://www.blogger.com/profile/08470562659597351033noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-18784087640539215522011-06-20T08:40:04.096-04:002011-06-20T08:40:04.096-04:00Someday, each of us will be touched by the death o...Someday, each of us will be touched by the death of a friend or loved one. I imagine this book would be a great comfort and guide.<br /><br />I'm not the fabulous cook my sisters are, so I clean for people. I'll weed their garden, sweep the house, or wash dishes.Maria Zanninihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01604862636922299273noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-29743102514948620142011-06-20T07:59:44.972-04:002011-06-20T07:59:44.972-04:00I like the idea of being there for those who are g...I like the idea of being there for those who are grieving, having a quiet presence with them during that time. Those little things, making a coffee, taking a walk, keep us connected.Joannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03972054718663959694noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-86403598359894719612011-06-20T07:58:54.502-04:002011-06-20T07:58:54.502-04:00Madeline, This sounds like a powerful book with he...Madeline, This sounds like a powerful book with healing included. <br /><br />Mason, Thanks for hosting!T. Powell Coltrinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02160774009926623671noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-43625177990817990502011-06-20T07:38:56.516-04:002011-06-20T07:38:56.516-04:00Mason - Thanks for hosting Madeline.
Madeline - ...Mason - Thanks for hosting Madeline.<br /><br /><br />Madeline - Thanks for sharing some of your journey in healing. You're absolutely right that people don't always know how to respond when someone is grieving, especially if it's a suicide. I'm sure your willingness to share your own experiences will be helpful to many.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-27396054485474119502011-06-20T07:18:28.196-04:002011-06-20T07:18:28.196-04:00Mason -Thanks for hosting Madeline. Her books soun...Mason -Thanks for hosting Madeline. Her books sounds good - just the right mixture of memoir and guide to getting through grief. As a counselor and a friend, I've spent many hours with folks in this excrutiating system. Sometimes it has been suicide, sometimes an accidental life that I believe was just suicide with another name. I think so many people are freaked out about it that they become frozen. Doing the awkward thing is not as bad as doing nothing - in my opinion.<br />We are awkward around death in this world.Jan Morrisonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01771180344305042855noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6582932888892465523.post-62436308226741063832011-06-20T05:40:44.706-04:002011-06-20T05:40:44.706-04:00A touching post. I try and be there for my friends...A touching post. I try and be there for my friends, but remain in the background. Sadly I have had to comfort several over the years, I find the little things are the greatest help. Such as Madeline's stone.Glynis Peters https://www.blogger.com/profile/01175378917872403609noreply@blogger.com